©2012 Edward C. Lunnon
Tuesday 18 September 2012: 6 years … Advantage CBD
Today is my 56th birthday and the 6th birthday living with CBD. Not bad, when one considers that I was told at 50 that I had 5 years left to live!
These years have been exciting but challenging, and I have attempted to document as much as possible in the blogs that I have been writing. Hopefully, you have had some idea of the journey that I have been travelling and have experienced some of the highs and lows that go with living with an incurable disease.
Unfortunately, I am no longer able to keep up the frenetic pace at which I have been writing. Not only is my physical ability to write becoming more difficult, but my mind becomes cloudier and confused. Of late, I have had to resort to abbreviated blogs and key words.
Please forgive me if I am no longer able to write to friends or contact them personally. That does not mean that you are not in my thoughts, and I hope that does not mean that I am no longer in your thoughts!
These have been eventful years, but not easy years – not for me or for Pera, Sean and Phillip.
They have been fun years, but also frightening years.
They have been different years and also difficult years.
There have been exciting times and times of great effort.
There have been bright times and bad times.
They have been demanding and trying times.
These have been the best of times and the worst of times.
This past weekend has been the most difficult time for me, physically and mentally, since becoming ill. I spent most of my time lying on my right side on my bed. It’s the most comfortable place to be! But it’s also a lonely place to be and it’s also a place that allows your mind to play games with you.
For once, I allowed myself to think about the future and the years that lie ahead. How many, I do not know! The quantity is as uncertain as the quality.
All I do know is that I will need strength.
“Give strength to hands that are tired and to knees that tremble with weakness.” (Isaiah 35:3)
Some people go to great lengths to build up their physical strength by “body-building” exercises and food supplements. But there are different kinds of strength – financial, political, intellectual, sporting, mental and many others.
I need mental and spiritual strength.
But I will also need courage.
Human beings are capable of amazing acts of courage! We have especially seen that during the recent Paralympics in London.
Most of us are cowards – we become discouraged and lose hope.
But a positive attitude can make a world of difference.
One needs to be positive, hopeful and determined to overcome the adverse circumstances which face you.
“Tell everyone who is discouraged, ‘Be strong and don’t be afraid’”. (Isaiah 35:4)
So if there is a birthday present that I need this year then it will be that I need mental and spiritual strength and lots of courage.
I need you to continue supporting me in the time that still lies ahead of me.
My power is made perfect in weakness. Lord, make me strong and a source of strength to others.